Archive for August, 2010

There is a good excuse to get Starbucks everyday of the week.

Monday – its monday! nuf said

Tuesday – It is usually my night shift day or my long day so i get a Starbucks

Wednesday – There is no reason to get it this day…thats why I get it.

Thursday – It’s my day off so i must get a Starbucks and spend a little time there.

Friday -You need a reason to celebrate the last day of work and the end of the week.

Saturday – I SHOULD have this day off, like the rest of the world, but i do not….so i buy a Starbucks.

Sunday – I do not know a better way to start off adequate worship then to have a Starbucks beforehand.  .

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Aug 252010

You see these items below?  These are all the items my nephew freely, and happily gave to me while we were on vacation.

Lately I’ve been asking God to show me how to have a giving heart (see previous blog).  To show me His heart for giving. God indeed has started showing me.  He has used my little Nephew Evan to begin this process in me.

Each item  in this picture below has a story.  Each story shows a little bit of Evans heart and a little bit of my heart in response to his giving.  Enjoy!

The Stuffed Turtle:

Evan arrived in Ocean City a day before i did.  When i got there, i got the impression that he was pretty happy to see me.  He gave me a hug, and as usual, ran away.  He returned just moments later with this stuffed turtle in his hands and said, “Here Aunt Colleen, I want you to have this.”  To which i responded, “Wow, Buddy!  Thanks! This means so much to me!”  Even though I have no need for a little stuffed turtle, the fact that he wanted to give it to me because he loves me, gave me so much joy.  My sister later told me that she was very surprised that Evan gave me that turtle because it was one of his favorite toys.

The Silly Bands:

Just a few hours later he showed me all of his silly bands.  He had about 24.  He had animal ones and music ones (the mermaid one he had given me a few weeks ago).  Evan asked me, “Do you like Silly Bands Aunt Colleen?”

I replied with “I do, buddy.”

“You may have some.” he said matter-of-factly.

Without taking his favorite out first.  He allowed me to choose from all of them – any two I wanted.  Struggling in my heart (in fear that i would choose his favorite) i asked him which ones were his favorite.  He removed about 5 of them.  From the leftovers i chose the clarinet and the turtle.   I wore them all week.

The Big Brown Mermaid:

No, your eyes do not deceive you.  The mermaid is a beer bottle opener.  One day Mike and Christine took Evan to the Boardwalk where they did some shopping.  Even came across this big brown mermaid, and thought of me.  He asked Mike and Christine if he could get it for me.  They allowed.  When they came back to the Beach House i was on the porch reading.  Evan reached in to one of the shopping bags, pulled out the mermaid, and said “I got this for you Aunt Colleen.  Its a Mermaid.  I know you like them.”

The Quarter (not in the picture):

A few days in to our vacation, Evan and i were sitting on the porch playing with his finger monster toys. Mike, Evans father, came up to us after his trip to the beach.  Mike turned to Evan and gave him 60 cents that he had found.  Evan then turned to me and said, “Here Aunt Colleen, You can have one of my quarters.”  I hesitated taking it, knowing how valuable quarters are to little kids.  Also, i was thinking “Ive gotta whole bunch of quarters sitting in my bank account.  I have access to more quarters then Evan can even imagine.” So i sat there struggling thinking “how can i explain to a 5 year old that i appreciate the gift but i know the quarter would bless him more then it could bless me because i have endless amounts of quarters.   So, i told him to keep it.

The moment the words “Buddy you keep it and by yourself something awesome with it”  came out of my mouth, i wanted to smack myself in the head and say “STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!”  Because it was not two seconds later that God entered my thoughts and said, “From now on accept everything that he gives you to encourage his giving.  Then, buy him something that is worth more quarters then he can even count. Something that would really bless him.”

So  i did.  I bought him a little wooden dinosaur thing that he could paint. He loves to paint and he loves dinosaurs. It was worth 45 quarters.

The Dime:

Evan asked me if i would come to his room to look at and play with all of his toys.  When we were there he pulled a dime off the bed stand.  ”My dad gave me this but i want you to have it.”  Remembering what God told me before, i accepted it.  Of course the whole time i knew  i was going to bless him with something great.  Then as we were sitting there, he looked up at me and said. “Aunt colleen?  May i buy you something else?  I saw a heart-shaped-thing at a store that i really thought you would like.”  I was holding back tears as his words hit my ears.  I responded, “Buddy you may buy me anything you want.”

The Pill:

These pills are toys that you can race on a track? i guess?  I’m not quite sure what the heck they are.  What i DO know about them is that, on the back of them they are ranked.  They are ranked according to how rare they are.  They can be  - not rare, somewhat rare, rare, really rare, super rare, and ultra rare.  My nephew had bought a pack of them on the Boardwalk and wanted to show me them.  He had about 7 of them.  Mike and Even took the time and explained all of them to me.

Then mike got to the last one.  It was a little fat green one with a leprechaun on it.  Mike picked it up in his hand and said, “This one, this one is ULTRA rare. Meaning, its very hard to find and have.”  Then he placed it back in Evans hand.

Even, looking at me, says, “You know, you can have one Aunt Colleen.”   Again, as before with the silly bands, he gave me the option to choose which one i wanted first, before he choose.  Knowing i would never play with these pills, I tried to look for one that i didn’t think he would want or miss, but, i just wasn’t sure.  So i said “How about you choose for me?”  Without hesitation he picked up the rarest of them all, the ultra rare leprechaun, and said, “i want you to have this one.”  I looked at Mike, knowing it was his money used for these toys not Evens, and said “Are you sure Evan, this is the most rare of all! its the most valuable, best one.”

Mike looked at Even and said “its up to you buddy, they are your toys.”  Even looked at me and said, “I want you to have it.”  But alas, I let Evan know that the green pill would be really valuable one day and that i thought it would be best if he kept it.  So he chose to give me the pill with the blond hair.

The little Yellow Thingie:

I don’t know what to say about this one.  i have no idea what it is.   Evan found it, was playing with it and then said, “i want to give this too you.”

At the end of the week, my heart was so blessed and wrapped up with emotion because of my nephews giving that i couldn’t help but smile and feel so proud of him.  He captured my heart every time I saw his heart to give.  In the end i realized that my hearts response to give back to him was not because he gave, it was because he gave all he had, which was motivated by his love for me.  He gave things that meant something to him. He gave even if it cost him something, because he loves me :)

*sigh*  i couldn’t even get through typing this with out shedding  a tear or two.

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Aug 212010

Our bible study just got done reading the book, Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  The first few chapters are a easy- breezy-feel-good chapters about God and how awesome He is.  Buuuut….the rest of the book….OUCH!  Chan + the Holy Spirit really have a way of making you examine your heart for God.

Much of the rest of Chans book talks about our heart for others.  Do we really LOVE others?  Chan also asks the question, “What do we do with the resources God gives us.  Do we use the resources to serve ourselves or others?”  For example, our money?  Now, dont get me wrong, Chan DOES NOT try to convince you to try to give all your money away to a local church.  However, he does challenge you to really examine how RICH we really are.  How much do we spend on our own comfort instead of helping those around us who are in need?

Am i really willing to give myself less so others can have more??  You see, i reason to myself, “Im giving more then the bible says to give…so…im good right GOd?”  OR i think,  ”Wow, i can give a whole bunch of money to God and the poor and still live comfortably.  Neat!”

If you, like me, think this….then i would question if we really have a giving heart.   Ive come to learn that its not the quantity that Gods impressed with.  It is the quality (meaning from the heart) and the sacrifice the giver has to make.

Luke 21: 1-4  As he looked up, Jesus saw the rich putting their gifts into the temple treasury.2He also saw a poor widow put in two very small copper coins.[a] 3“I tell you the truth,” he said, “this poor widow has put in more than all the others. 4All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on.”

Some how, i still make it about the quantity tho.  Somehow think, “If i could only be rich and have millions of dollars….i would give SO much to the poor.”    I felt God say to me, “You are rich, Colleen, and you can give SO much to the poor….but you dont because it costs you more then you want it to.”

The other day i gave a lady from my work a ride to the Bus Stop.  I offered to take her to her house but she insisted, no.  When approaching my car, (which is a little, cheep, 2006 kia) she said, “WOW you must be rich!!  Look at your car!”  I giggled to myself knowing the only reason i bought a kia was because it was all i could afford at the time.  So i decided to agree with her in my heart, “Yes, i am rich.”

Did you know, in the bible, God says to give, and to test Him with this act to see if he will bless us abundantly for it?  See for yourself below.  It is the only scripture in all of the bible that tells us to test the Lord. It is the only area where God gives us permission to test him

Malachi 3:10  Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the LORD Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it.

So then why do i still hold on to my money as if IM poor?  Why do i still think that i dont have enough money?  Why do i hold on to my money as if IT will give me security?  Why do i not take advantage of this wonderful scripture and give MORE money away then i can afford, and see if “God will open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that i will not have enough room for it?”

Lately ive been asking God to show me how to be a better giver.  To change my heart to give freely and happily no matter what the cost is.  To have a giving heart like Him.

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Aug 212010